Eunice's blog

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FW: Marriage Humor (婚姻幽默)

Marriage Humor (婚姻幽默) Wife: 'What are you doing?' 妻:你在作什麼啊? Husband : Nothing. 夫:沒作什麼。 Wife : 'Nothing...? You've been reading our marriage certificate for an hour.' 妻:沒作什麼?你看著我們的結婚證書,足足有一小時了。 Husband : 'I was looking for the expiry date.' 夫:我在尋找它的有效日期是到什麼時候。 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Wife : 'Do you want dinner?' 妻: 要吃晚餐嗎? Husband : 'Sure! What are my choices?' 夫: 當然!我可以選擇嗎? Wife : 'Yes or no.' 妻:要或不要。 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Wife: 'You always carry my photo in your wallet. Why?' 妻:為什麼你經常把我的照片放在你皮夾裡? Hubby: 'When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.' 夫:當問題發生時,不管有多困難,我看著妳照片就迎刃而解了。 Wife: 'You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you!' 妻:你看我對你有多麼驚人的影響力啊! Hubby: 'Yes! I see your picture and ask myself what other problem can there be greater than this one?' 夫:是啊!望著妳的照片我問自己,還有什麼困難比這個來得大呢? ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Stress Reliever Girl: 'When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.' 女孩:婚後我要分擔你所有的煩惱、困擾,以減輕你的負擔。 Boy: 'It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.' 男孩:親愛的,妳真體貼,但我並沒有任何煩惱或困擾。 Girl: 'Well that's because we aren't married yet.' 女孩:哦?那是因為我們還沒結婚的緣故。 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Son: ' Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.' 子:今早我和爹地一起搭車,他要我讓座給一位女士。 Mom: 'Well, you have done the right thing.' 母:嗯,你這麼做是對的。 Son: 'But mom, I was sitting on daddy's lap.' 子:但是,媽,我當時是坐在爹地的腿上呢。 ____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ ____ A newly married man asked his wife, 'Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?' 一位新婚的先生問他太太:如果我父親沒留下巨額財產給我,你會嫁給我嗎? 'Honey,' the woman replied sweetly, 'I'd have married you, N O MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE!' 女人溫柔的答道:親愛的,不管是誰留下財產給你,我都會嫁給你的。 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever . 女孩對著男友說:吻我一下,我就永遠屬於你了。 The guy replies: 'Thanks for the early warning.' 男孩回道:謝謝您提早警告我。 ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- A wife asked her husband: 'What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?' 妻問夫:你最喜歡我哪一點?我美麗的臉龐,還是我性感的軀體? He looked at her from head to toe and replied: 'I like your sense of humor.' 他把她從頭到腳瀏覽了一遍,回道:我喜歡你的幽默感。